One person is all that everybody needs. That one true love which makes our world go around. That person who lights up our world and makes it magical.

Ever since I was a little girl, I heard one message louder than the others: finding a man and settling down was the epitome of a woman’s accomplishment.

I turn 29 today, and I am still…single. And, I can confidently say that I am happy. And, believe me when I say happiness is a journey. Not a destination. However, in the past few months I spent in India, every family member, relative, and even an immigration officer had only ONE thing to say: “you are 29 now. It’s time to find someone and get married, now!!!

So naturally, I do feel the pressure of finding the one. Not because I want to, but because it doesn’t help either that most of my friends are engaged, married, expecting children or already mothers! So, I am told I am the only one left behind. As if it’s some race. It isn’t, but it sure seems like it.

I am even told that “being picky and choosy at this age doesn’t work” and that I must compromise and agree to the next best thing…else before I realize I will be 35 + single and hating my life.

The message is loud and clear that no matter what a woman accomplishes, her worth measures down to this one thing: finding a man.

Marriage and motherhood are not every woman’s calling. I hate that we, women, are told that we will never, ever, have a shot at love and will be deemed ‘unworthy’ by the time we’re 30 if we choose to stay single.

STOP telling women that marrying the next best thing is the ONLY real accomplishment. And that women who choose to stay single are looked at as failures.

Don’t get me wrong…

I am not against marriage. We are all wired for love and companionship. But, it needs to be done for the right reasons because I found the right person to share my life with, not in desperation that I am approaching my 30s and definitely NOT because all my friends are married and have kids.

There are so many unhappy and broken marriages that need never have happened. There is no reason why you, or any particular woman, should marry at any time if you don’t feel like it – let alone before 30 years old. You don’t need a man to complete you. You want only one man who complements you.

Ladies! Don’t subscribe to society’s limitations. There’s no time limit, and there are no rules to this life. Travel as far as you can. Fall in love with the different cities. Meet people with a different point of view. Create a life you are proud of. Focus on your dreams, and your dreams will focus on you. Focus on a man, and he’ll focus on another woman.

Don’t go through life trying to be small, accomodating, and being a convenience for others. Pour all your energy into becoming a confident, independent, and high-value woman. We only live once. Do it your way and on your terms.

Be fierce. Be fearless. Speak up even when your voice shakes. Own your power by reminding yourself that you write your life stories, nobody else. Let them call you a rebel for it!

xx

Yachna

P.S.

Heartwarming stories of love, & comforting post for broken hearts.

(Featured Image by sheseesthestars)